If you are part of Defector’s enormous Czech readership: Ahoj! Omlouvám se že náš náhled je pozdě.
For the rest of you: It’s hockey time! While the NHL gave us two little tastes of the regular season with its Prague contests between the Sabres and Devils, the North America action begins in earnest today, starting with a Kraken game at 1:30 p.m. local time. Who’s excited? I’m excited.
As is tradition, I have gathered into this post a whole bunch of thoughts that should get you in the mood for sweaters, beer, and loud horns. This time, each team is listed from worst to best by regular-season finish last year (with their playoff finish in parentheses). I’ve included something to like and something to perhaps dislike (or even hate) about all of them. Hell, I’ll even throw in a bold prediction for free: You will not find a more neutral and balanced preview anywhere in the English world. I can’t speak for Czechia, though.
San Jose Sharks
Something To Like: I count two reasons to be interested in the San Jose Sharks, and that’s two more than last year. First and most important is No. 1 overall pick Macklin Celebrini. I already used my annual pun allotment on his name while headlining the blog I wrote announcing his NHL arrival, but we should be hearing a lot about ol’ Mack in the years to come. A wunderkind who owned the NCAA as a literal child, Celebrini is a smart and determined center who is bursting with creativity—something he’ll desperately need if he wants to put up numbers with a thin supporting cast. (Will Smith, another scoring center who was a fourth overall pick last year, is also primed to get a ton of ice time behind him.)
The other reason to care about the Sharks is that they acquired 22-year-old goalie prospect Yaroslav Askarov from Nashville, where his path was blocked by Juuse Saros. Askarov is a charismatic showboat who dazzled in the minors and deserves a shot at the starter’s role in a wasteland like San Jose as soon as he works his way back from injury. If you long for the days of Dominik Hasek, he’s your new rock.
Something To Hate: The Sharks are still a bad team licking their wounds from a string of uncharacteristically irrelevant seasons. They’re not at all primed for a sudden turnaround—dealing talents for picks just doesn’t work like that. They’ll have to settle for trying to pass the “worst team in California” stink on to Anaheim.
Bold Prediction: Macklin leads the team in scoring and gets a buddy from the very tippy top of the prospect pool in next year’s draft.
Chicago Blackhawks
Something To Like: Oh cruel world, oh what brutal vocation has chosen me, that I have doomed myself to say something kind about the accursèd Chicago Blackhawks! Woe is the one who chooses this blogger’s life.
Connor Bedard lived up to the hype with a team-best 61 points at just 18 years old. He’s the real deal.
Something To Hate: Aside from everything, the fact that a teenager had to try to carry Chicago’s offense is something to be ashamed of. He should have been, like, explaining Chappell Roan to the coaching staff while the adults on the ice took charge. But as a rookie, Bedard had to endure the reality of a new life on a team that had tanked brutally and relentlessly for the exclusive right to employ him. They were last in their division by a mile, and even though they picked up about a half-mile’s worth of brand names this summer, like Teuvo Teravainen and Alec Martinez, this has all the markings of a transitional year where the most important action will be happening in Rockford.
Bold Prediction: Tyler Bertuzzi will get in trouble for something stupid. I don’t know what yet. I’m still in the forecasting process.
Anaheim Ducks
Something To Like: The jerseys you like are back. Whereas the Ducks (the “Mighty” is still silent) have wearily skated with the fashion faux-pas that was the webbed-foot “D” on their chests for longer than their original look was ever active, the masked duck would not die. After a few recent nods in its direction, Anaheim is wholeheartedly embracing the superiority of its ’90s aesthetic. The duck is now the default. As someone whose childhood viewings of D2 were essentially nonstop, I have to admit that it’s way more fun seeing that guy representing the team on the schedule instead of the generic “Is that the Stars or the Ducks?” previous logo.
Something To Hate: It’s been six years without a playoff berth, and the Ducks aren’t showing any signs of life. Their offseason was a boring one. John Gibson, onetime goalie of the future, is 31 years old and spiraling (and just lost his appendix). Trevor Zegras, their made-in-a-lab marketable cute guy at center, endured a lost season that has folks looking behind him for the next young Ducks on the rise. In that sense, there are early-20s kids you can talk yourself into like Mason McTavish, Leo Carlsson, and now Cutter Gauthier, fresh off his escape from Philadelphia. But they’re going to have to do it on their own.
Bold Prediction: The Ducks have a pointless little win streak at the start of the season and everyone briefly gets cute about how the jerseys have restored their mojo.
Columbus Blue Jackets
Something To Like: The Blue Jackets are now the NHL’s sentimental favorite for the absolute worst imaginable reason. In August, Columbus’s crown-jewel winger Johnny Gaudreau and his brother Matthew were killed by a driver while biking before their sister’s wedding in New Jersey. The news was universally devastating. The task that faces the Jackets’ relatively inexperienced players—to not just be emotionally ready for this season without Gaudreau, but to somehow try to improve on a year where they finished in the East’s basement—is an unfair one. But fans around the league will be pulling for them.
Something To Hate: Ivan Provorov is annoying.
Bold Prediction: Ohio State fires Ryan Day at the end of the season.
Montreal Canadiens
Something To Like: I went to Montreal back in April, and I absolutely j’adored that city. I trekked through knee-high snow to find Leonard Cohen’s grave, said “Merci!” a lot, grew secure in New York City’s bagel superiority, took in comically large helpings of art and culture and poutine, and also bought a great seat to a Habs-Leafs game. While there, I could easily see the appeal of being a Canadiens fan: the largest arena in the league, the winningest history, the most distinctive culture. There’s an allure to this franchise that survives even a sustained stretch of losing.
Something To Hate: Rebuilds suck, and Montreal is still mired in one. Their outlier run to the Cup Final as gigantic underdogs in 2021 aside, the transition from contender circa 2014 to a new generation of young stars hasn’t really gotten out of first gear. Nick Suzuki and Cole Caufield are solid bedrock, but so much of the Montreal experience of late has been registering a name on the back of a jersey and thinking, Hm, I wonder what that guy can do with a few years of development. In a heavyweight division like the Atlantic, it’ll take several breakouts to make a dent.
Also, mercurial goalscorer/possible has-been Patrik Laine, just nabbed from Ohio, is going to be out two to three months after a preseason knee injury.
Bold Prediction: Cayden Primeau asserts himself as the heir to Carey Price in goal.
Salt Lake City Skunks (Or Whatever)
Something To Like: I’ve been waiting years for this moment! While the NHL and the Coyotes pretended that Arizona State University’s rink could be a viable futon until a new arena got built, haters knew the truth: The good tax-allergic people of the Copper State would spit on the idea that any sort of public assistance should go toward recreational ice in the desert. The franchise tried hard to pitch their new home as sweetly as they could, but the state was as relentless with its rejections as Mark West when he played for the Suns. Finally, the humiliation became too much to bear, and ex-owner Alex Meruelo’s lucrative divorce from the club gave Mormon billionaire Jazz owner Ryan Smith a second spouse (in a manner of speaking). Smith is not introducing Utah to a playoff team, per se, but there’s reason for optimism with a defense bolstered by Tampa’s Mikhail Sergachev and an offense led by Clayton Keller, who deserved more than any other Coyote to play his home games somewhere that holds more than 5,000 people.
Something To Hate: OK. Hear me out. Does anyone kind of miss the Coyotes? Even just as a punching bag? Who am I supposed to tell to move to Halifax now?
More seriously, I am so sick of this thing where it takes a whole year to come up with a team name. That should take like a week, tops! When I was naming my band in high school, we literally just stuck ourselves in a bedroom and tossed out ideas until we hit on something that none of us despised. We were done in time for dinner, with none of the secrecy and sobriety of a hedge fund in the middle of an SEC investigation.
What was the band’s name? Oh, it was “Coconut Motel.” Hm. Actually, maybe Utah Hockey Club should take their time on this.
Bold Prediction: Ryan Smith reads this blog, gives me a pass on the LDS crack (and my whole “being gay” thing), and decides Salt Lake City Skunks is actually a genius name.
Ottawa Senators
Something To Like: Remember Senators Week? Those were the days, back when Ottawa hockey was about scrappy kids still learning how to be pros. It’s been three years, and everything has changed: Ottawa hockey is now about scrappy young adults still learning how to be pros. It’s Travis Green’s turn to take control of this underachieving core behind the bench, and even though there is nothing on his resume that tells you he’s up to the task, the Sens might at least benefit from a huge upgrade in goal. Linus Ullmark, formerly half of the bricks in Boston’s vaunted goal wall, might alone carry the Senators into that zone of “We’ll steal a game from you right when you need it most.” Yes? Ha, ha, ha, yes?
Something To Hate: The cat-herding that is trying to get all these 20-somethings on the same page at once. Tim Stützle, at age 22, scored 21 fewer goals last year than he did in the one before, with basically the same amount of ice time. Joshua Norris, after a 35-goal year in 2021-22, is still dealing with a bum shoulder. The ideal version of these Sens, where all of these picks and prospects reach their potential all at once, is a formidable one, and it’s been those bursts of greatness that have kept people like me invested in this whole project they’ve got going on. But life hasn’t really been in the mood to cooperate.
Bold Prediction: Travis Green doesn’t last the year.
Seattle Kraken
Something To Like: I like the “Lithium” goal song, and in general I’ve enjoyed tuning into the back half of Seattle home games on weeknights before bed. Last year was a step back from the team’s first-ever playoff trip, as the Kraken’s struggle to find first-class goalscoring as an expansion franchise dragged down what was a pretty solid defense. But it’s reasonable to hope for better in this fourth time around. Matty Beniers, at 21 years old, hit the sophomore slump but still holds the key that can unlock this offense. Adding Brandon Montour from the championship Panthers should also provide them an additional edge. Give this roster a little bit of puck luck, and they could make some noise
Something To Hate: The coaching situation has me a little edgy. Dave Hakstol, the Kraken’s inaugural coach, got fired at the end of last season, and there’s some controversy over whether or not that firing was basically demanded by the players. (There are a couple cases of forwards that Hakstol sidelined breaking out as scorers elsewhere.) Replacing him is Dan Bylsma, a Stanley Cup winner with the Penguins who failed in Buffalo in his most recent NHL job eight long years ago. His record with the team’s AHL affiliate prevents this from being one of those “team picks old name out of a hat” hirings, but Bylsma had a testy enough relationship with Sabres star Jack Eichel that morale will be something to keep an eye on.
Bold Prediction: Kraken kids Tye Kartye and Shane Wright each take significantly enhanced roles in the forward corps and help lift the scoring to something more like league average. Why not?
Calgary Flames
Something To Like: After missing the playoffs for the second year in a row and watching their old leader Matthew Tkachuk win a Cup with the Panthers, the Flames are in full retreat. One of their only really good skaters not into his 30s, Noah Hanifin, was traded to the Knights at the deadline, and this offseason seemed more focused on next year’s lottery than anything else.
How is that something to like? Well, if nothing else, this year for the Flames is going to be about some relative newcomers who might be long-term contributors. Dustin Wolf, the skinny little goalie who cleaned up in the minors, is going to get a shot at the starting role with Jacob Markström gone. Center Connor Zary will look to build on the 34 points he earned as a rookie. The Flame in Calgary is not eternal, but these guys have some matches.
Something To Hate: All right, that’s all I got. Two years ago, I was raving about how Calgary was like the least flawed team on the continent. This version, however, is totally unrecognizable, as a second-round loss to the Oilers back then gave way to a wave of departures. Thank god they at least have the Ducks and Sharks to cushion their fall in this division.
Also, the Saddledome is on its way out. They’re building a new arena that doesn’t even look like a saddle. What’s the point?
Bold Prediction: The restaurateurs of Calgary team up to make sure Dustin Wolf gets some pasta in him every day, and he turns in a season better than Markström manages in New Jersey.
New Jersey Devils
Something To Like: I went to my first-ever Devils game last year, brought a whole gang, and had a good time despite a loss that had fans booing as the clock hit zeroes. There was less menace compared to Rangers games, I would say, and more of a “alt-rock kids that still have a good relationship with their parents” vibe. I look forward to returning, and a big part of the allure there, even after a painful regression season for the Devils, is Jack Hughes. The 23-year-old center with the sexy hair and the shy voice struggled to stay healthy but still produced at an impressive pace, keeping his spot as the anchor of a forward nucleus that any franchise would be lucky to have. Timo Meier will hopefully be a little more comfortable this year, while Nico Hischier and Jesper Bratt should be just now hitting their prime. I like their bounceback chances.
Something To Hate: Sheldon Keefe is here after a bunch of early playoff exits in Toronto. What the heck is he gonna do? Who knows, but the forward-heavy nature of this Devs team echoes a bit of that Leafs lopsidedness. With the exception of blue-line prodigy Luke Hughes and injured-all-last-year Dougie Hamilton, the names that really stand out are the attackers, and while Jersey did work to add some depth in the back this offseason, I’d love if the team returns to its exuberant, fast-break style of two years ago.
Wait, I guess I failed to really hate anything here. Devils superfan Kevin Smith is … actually, no I can’t do it. Mallrats is a classic.
Bold Prediction: Jack Hughes makes a run at the Hart Trophy. I believe in you, Jack.
Buffalo Sabres
Something To Like: The Sabres have given their fans some tiny bursts of hope to latch onto over the past few years. And with Tage Thompson centering the attacking unit, plus highly touted prospects like Owen Power and Rasmus Dahlin on the blue line, you can’t say they don’t have a foundation to build on. But the inertia from a 13-year playoff drought, plus the challenge of keeping up in the Atlantic, keeps the Sabres miserable. It’ll take some miracle goalie play and some dramatic downfalls in their division to change the story this year.
That may not sound like something to like, but here’s the thing: It can’t get any worse. If you invest yourself in the Sabres, how are they going to hurt you? Oh, they’re going to not make the playoffs again? How scary.
Something To Hate: Your new head coach is … Lindy Ruff, who stalled out the Devils and, somehow, was coaching Buffalo when this playoff drought began.
Bold Prediction: Mmm, I think I’m going to pick up some Buffalo wings tonight. Boneless, of course.
Philadelphia Flyers
Something To Like: Matvei Michkov, the mystery teen from Russia, has arrived in Philly, and everyone is extremely psyched about him. This was a young man drafted seventh overall who could have been a No. 1 or 2 if he’d been born in like, Manitoba, or really anywhere where it was more of a given that he’d go right to the NHL. The word on the улица is that he’s a lightning bolt of a forward with great stick skills and a love for dismantling defenses. The word is also sometimes negative about a kind of superstar swagger that he may or may not carry, but that only makes me more excited about his American debut.
Something To Hate: I’ve been watching hockey for going on three decades and I’ve never found anything appealing about the Flyers. None of their teams, even the successful ones, were all that endearing to me. They’re the obvious fourth-favorite among the Philly sports sickos. Their history is more about the guys they’ve beaten up than the games they’ve won. Their current coach, John Tortorella, keeps up this grating tell-it-like-it-is gimmick that was past its expiration date a decade ago. (God, do I want to see how he’ll handle Michkov.) And when something unflattering happens—for example, 2022 fifth overall pick Cutter Gauthier refusing to sign and forcing a trade—it reinforces my anti-Flyer prejudices.
Justice for Valeri Kharlamov.
Bold Prediction: All Philadelphia sports are canceled in the aftermath of the Phillies’ World Series celebrations and/or riots.
Minnesota Wild
Something To Like: Kirill Kaprizov is a blessing. The story of how the Wild picked the 2015 fifth-rounder because smog stranded their scout and allowed him to watch the youngster at Metallurg Novokuznetsk is a reminder of the ways in which team building is never entirely a science. And Kaprizov is an artist on the ice, scoring goals in every way imaginable as he hit the 40 mark for the third straight year at age 26. Minnesota badly needs all of those goals, because even with them they were still 21st in the league in scoring at the end of a backslide of a 2023–24 campaign.
Something To Hate: The Wild have one more year of salary-cap purgatory before they can stop paying Zach Parise and Ryan Suter nearly $15 million to not play hockey for them. Those mega-contracts from another era have hampered their ability to augment Kaprizov. That they didn’t sink all the way to the bottom last year, even with subpar goalie play, is a testament to the way they’ve been able to use duct tape when they can’t afford repairs. Both Matt Boldy at the wing and Brock Faber on D have been precocious successes that the Wild have already locked up on a new round of long-term deals. Kaprizov, however, becomes a free agent in 2026.
Bold Prediction: The usual thing where the Wild are just good enough to make a blink-and-you-miss-it cameo in the playoffs has imprinted itself on me even after the big drop last season. Screw it: They find a way back into the first round.
Pittsburgh Penguins
Something To Like: I’m sure Penguins fans are down about the end of their long streak of playoff appearances, but speaking from some experience, you need to savor these years. You still have Sidney Crosby, a legend. You still have Evgeni Malkin, a legend. You have Erik Karlsson, a future Hall of Famer even if he’s not fundamentally a Pittsburgh Guy. And heck, I’ll even allow you some warm feelings for Kris Letang. All four of them somehow played 82 games last year to ensure that the Pens were just a good goalie or an effective power play away from another postseason. I wouldn’t bet on that happening again, but you can still make some memories on the comedown.
Something To Hate: It’s kind of absurd that even with Karlsson as a playmaker and Crosby enjoying a vintage year, only Columbus and Philly had worse power plays than Pittsburgh. New assistant David Quinn now takes the reins for that unit after getting fired as the Sharks’ head coach, so if you watch the Pens in the early part of the season, you’ll probably hear a bunch about how their “energy” is more “urgent” with the man advantage.
Bold Prediction: This isn’t a prediction so much as advice. You should go see Crosby if he comes to your town and you haven’t before. He’s not Bob Dylan; there’s an end to this tour.
Detroit Red Wings
Something To Like: Last season was the best Red Wings effort since they last made the playoffs, which was during the Obama administration. They hung in the race for the eight seed with the Capitals jalopy (more on that shortly) until the bitter, bitter end. For that reason, it’s natural to believe the line will continue to go up. Even though this team got weaker in free agency, primarily because they had to re-sign key kids Mo Seider and Lucas Raymond to bigger deals, the prospects they’ve amassed through an eternity spent in the bottom half could just inflate them enough for a return to the old days. And by “old days,” I mean, “that thing at the end of the playoff streak where they were just drooping in the first round every year.”
Something To Hate: This rebuild is taking FOREVER. Just gimme a playoff game! Gimme gimme gimme!
Bold Prediction: It really all comes down to the goaltending group, which adds 37-year-old Cam Talbot after a pretty messy year at that position. I think the Red Wings’ record is going to reflect their overall save percentage almost exactly. My heart isn’t built for that kind of randomness.
Washington Capitals (First Round)
Something To Like: It’s the Alex Ovechkin goal chase. It’s always been the goal chase. Technically, the Caps made the playoffs even with a goal differential way below sea level. But after a first-round sweep, the takeaway from the year was nothing but “How many goals did Ovi score?” It was a team-high 31 at age 38, putting him just 41 away from tying Wayne Gretzky for first on the all-time list. Ovechkin’s season was made even more impressive by the fact that he started with just six goals in his first 33 games, looking eroded and lost with a weak supporting cast. Still, he hunted for one-timers in that left circle, and he erased the doubts when the calendar flipped to 2024.
The Caps have been at the end of their meal for quite a while now, but Ovechkin’s need to keep performing at a high level has kept them from leaving the table. They were busy this offseason, adding a couple of high-quality defensemen and new friends for Ovi in the form of Andrew Mangiapane and Pierre-Luc Dubois—both of whom are coming off disappointing seasons, but both of whom also can force defenses to look away from big No. 8. The dude scored 42 goals just two seasons ago. The rules of time and age be damned, there’s some real suspense in D.C. this year.
Something To Hate: After trading Darcy Kuemper to L.A. for Dubois, in what was basically a swap of hefty contracts that both franchises regretted, the goalie situation in Washington is now Charlie Lindgren and Logan Thompson. Lindgren just enjoyed his first strong NHL season at age 30, while the younger Thompson struggled to stick as Vegas’s first option. Also, big dirty man Tom Wilson still plays for this team.
Bold Prediction: A subplot that interests me is Jakub Vrána, a promising kid for Washington whose career turned bleak after a 2021 trade, getting another shot here with a training camp invite. I think he makes it through the year with them.
St. Louis Blues
Something To Like: Something … to like … about the St. Louis Blues … is that … they … can … ummm …
Something To Hate: This has been the most nondescript team in the NHL ever since they fluked a Stanley Cup in 2019. Their 1C is named “Robert Thomas,” for crying out loud. But if anyone can break through the bleh and make news this season, it’ll be Jordan Binnington. Best known for helping make that Cup win happen, the now 31-year-old goaltender is coming off a pick-me-up year after playing the role of albatross in 2022–23. That’s not why we care about him, though. We care about Binnington because he is whiny and petty and pugnacious, especially when he’s letting a lot of pucks through. It’s fun when he’s letting a lot of pucks through.
Bold Prediction: The NHL finally stops fawning over Jon Hamm for being a Blues fan. There’s nothing “legendary” about him liking Ivan Barbashev, you simps!
New York Islanders (First Round)
Something To Like: This team was 22nd in the league in goals scored and 19th in goals against, and yet they were still a playoff team. And not even the worst one! That’s what I call Islanders magic—that thing where, even if the team on the ice doesn’t project much of a threat, they still find a way to get more goals than the other guy. I feel like I saw more “What’s wrong with the Islanders?” pieces last year than any other team, and yet even as they switched coaches to Patrick Roy midseason and endured a rough drop-off from franchise netminder Ilya Sorokin, the Isle boys could not be derailed until they hit the Hurricanes in late April. Even better: They added winger-to-the-stars Anthony Duclair in the offseason, who’ll shoulder a heavier scoring burden than he has on previous clubs but has proven in the past that he’s got 30 goals in him.
Something To Hate: I took the LIRR to their new home for the first time to see a wrestling show this summer, and it was like Apple built an arena. Unlike Nassau Coliseum, nobody will ever call it a “barn.”
Bold Prediction: Roy’s going to give at least four different quotes across the year that are basically “Look, we suck at this right now, I don’t know why,” and they’re still going to reach a first-round Hurricanes series again.
Vegas Golden Knights (First Round)
Something To Like: No team in the salary cap era has tried like the Golden Knights have tried. Since they hit the ground running in their expansion season, the front office has taken seriously their mandate to win over an entirely new group of fans. VGK has stacked brand-name veterans on brand-name veterans and tried to squeeze them under the salary cap like they’re packing a single suitcase for a monthlong trip. Their reward was a Stanley Cup in 2023, and while they struggled to get a full season out of basically anyone in their title defense, it was mostly tough breaks against Dallas that sent them out of the playoffs early.
Something To Hate: This is the season where Vegas finally has to pay for all of its short-term improvements. Jonathan Marchessault is the departure that stings the most: a team-best 42 goals last year, the franchise’s all-time leader in points, and a guy who encompassed the entirety of the Knights’ history. One could envision a healthier roster that improves on last season’s record, but one could also envision this being the end of the era.
Bold Prediction: The NHL is making the Knights wait practically the entire season before Marchessault first returns to Vegas with the Predators. He’s gonna cry.
Tampa Bay Lightning (First Round)
Something To Like: That’s two punchless first-round exits in a row for the Bolts, and they watched their leader Steven Stamkos decamp for Nashville. But there’s still no grounds for complaint. Yes, this is a mini-dynasty in serious decline, but they’re still dreaming of a third Stanley Cup in this window. Jake Guentzel has entered the scene after his third straight 30-goal season, Ryan McDonagh has returned after two years in Tennessee for a nostalgia boost, and still-elite goaltender Andrei Vasilevskiy has a much better season in him than he put up in 2023–24. Plus, Nikita Kucherov continues to absolutely destroy defenses. They may not be fried yet!
Something To Hate: The thing about the Lightning is that I just get kind of sad thinking about Florida in general and the ways it’s tried to drive out all evidence of queerness in the state. As such, I am beginning my campaign to move these guys to Halifax. There are gays up there, right?
Bold Prediction: The Bolts contradict everything I said and deliver an awkward letdown. They miss the playoffs for the first time since 2017.
Los Angeles Kings (First Round)
Something To Like: I really appreciated the way that the Kings constructed their roster, even if they did get dismissed in the opening round by the Oilers for the third straight year. Drew Doughty, in his 16th season with the team, led the guys in ice time, while Anže Kopitar, a full 18 years in, remained a critical playmaker. But they were joined by a mix of prime acquisitions and valuable draft picks like Quinton Byfield, Trevor Moore, and Kevin Fiala, who helped control possession and provided just enough scoring to make Los Angeles a contender. There were definitely more talented teams out there, but the Kings were a nice example of how to mix long-term vets with interesting kids and smart summer pickups. If they hadn’t whiffed on that “Alex Turcotte over Moritz Seider” pick in 2019, they might have really been in business.
Also, not unlike the Ducks, the Kings are going back to that retro Chevrolet logo after a long stretch with a pretty blah-looking black shield. All you folks with Rob Blake jerseys did a great job playing the long game.
Something To Hate: The Pierre-Luc Dubois situation didn’t work out, and that relationship is over, but it’s even worse that Viktor Arvidsson is now hanging in Edmonton, and No. 2 defenseman Matt Roy signed a deal with the Caps. Arvidsson didn’t get to play much last year, but he was a regular 20-goal guy who could sometimes produce spectacular moments, and Roy leaves a pretty big hole to fill for kids like 2021 first-rounder Brandt Clarke or the Australian-born/Osaka-raised Jordan Spence. Without these three, and with Doughty set to miss most of the regular season with a broken ankle, and the fact Kopitar has to age out of his crucial role sooner or later, the Kings’ depth starts to look like a problem.
Bold Prediction: The division is soft enough to get them into the playoffs, where they put the fear in someone when whichever of their blob of goalies gets hot.
Nashville Predators (First Round)
Something To Like, Love, Want Some More Of: Nobody had a better offseason than the Preds, who raised a middle finger at what could have been a retreat year and signed Steven Stamkos, Jonathan Marchessault, and Brady Skjei. For head coach Andrew Brunette, to try to fit these guys around already existing talents like Roman Josi and Filip Forsberg is about the most exciting challenge a head coach can have. As a group that meshed together late last year to earn a playoff spot as some depth guys stepped up, they’re entering this new age with all the momentum. The party will not stop in Nashville until it is forcibly shut down by the fire inspector.
Something To Hate: You know this if you read the Sharks bit, but in committing to goalie Juuse Saros for another eight years, the Preds did have to forfeit the game’s most tantalizing goalie prospect, Yaroslav Askarov, and his mustache. I guess nobody can ever have it all.
Bold Prediction: Saros … rebounds from a down year? No, wait, he slips even further until he becomes a liability! Scratch that, never mind! He wins the Vezina! God, I hate goalie scouting.
Toronto Maple Leafs (First Round)
Something To Like: Even when the Toronto sky is gray, and the Blue Jays have finished in last place, and the political landscape is almost as depressing as America’s, and the Leafs are still reeling from another Game 7 loss to the Bruins, you continue to have the privilege of rooting for Auston Matthews. A man who was put on God’s icy Earth to score goals, the newly minted Leafs captain is coming off a staggering career high of 69, amplified by a trio of star forwards in William Nylander, John Tavares, and Mitch Marner. Together, they’ll yet again try to forge a path to glory and break one of sports’ most brutal championship droughts. It hasn’t been enough before, but maybe this time.
Something To Hate: Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha.
Bold Prediction: New head coach Craig Berube wins the championship. No, I’m serious! I got a look at his fantasy football team, and it is freaky good. You won’t believe how late he got Jayden Daniels.
Edmonton Oilers (Cup Final)
Something To Like: That Game 6, man. I know Florida ended up coming back and hoisting the Cup and that’s what matters and blah blah blah, but I think the Oilers rising from the ashes to tie that series three-all in front of a delirious home crowd is what sticks with me most out of everything that happened in the playoffs. While the first chunk of last year felt pretty bad, it turned out to be the long-awaited breakout for an Oiler team that, despite carrying perhaps the two greatest players in the world, hadn’t won a conference final game since 2006. The best possible news for 2024–25 is that the formula will look basically the same. Leon Draisaitl and Connor McDavid will control possession and create goals. Zach Hyman will likely regress from his mark of 54 but still provide a finishing presence. Evan Bouchard will fire blasts from the blue line. And Viktor Arvidsson’s here to add even more scoring depth.
Something To Hate: ONLY TWO MORE YEARS OF CONNOR MCDAVID UNDER CONTRACT! I REPEAT: ONLY TWO MORE YEARS OF CONNOR MCDAVID UNDER CONTRACT! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Bold Prediction: The Oilers follow the Panthers’ lead and win it all the year after finishing runners-up.
Colorado Avalanche (Second Round)
Something To Like: If you can’t have Draisaitl and McDavid, the next best thing is to have Nathan MacKinnon and Mikko Rantanen. The Avs went whole hog on their 2022 Cup run, and the subsequent two seasons have underwhelmed as they’ve dealt with injury and cap casualties. But MacKinnon and Rantanen are still a trusty engine on which last year’s league-leading offense ran. MacKinnon makes the more spectacular highlights as a pulverizing skater with fancy skills around the net, while Rantanen is a perfect complement who can stretch defenses with his craftiness.
All that, and the league’s best defense pairing of Cale Makar and Devon Toews. This is as good a top four as it gets. Even Edmonton can’t beat it.
Something To Hate: Blond bombshell Gabriel Landeskog, once a teenaged captain, was as important to the foundation of this franchise as Nate and Mikko. Over the past few seasons, however, he’s been completely absent as he’s battled a long-term serious knee issue. The story is that he might make it back this year, but even if he does it’s hard to imagine what he’ll look like.
Bold Prediction: The Avs feel way too top-heavy to trust. I sense a bad year incoming.
Boston Bruins (Second Round)
This preview is getting very long, and I don’t care about the Bruins.
That was so much better than talking about Hampus Lindholm.
Vancouver Canucks (Second Round)
Something To Like: Hey, hey, hey, hey! Counted out by most observers both before and during their shock season, the ‘Nucks escaped the quicksand that threatened to smother the franchise, won their division, and made it to Game 7 of the second round after missing the playoffs three straight years. Led by Quinn Hughes on defense, who helped them control the puck during his nearly 25 minutes of ice time per night, Vancouver found contributors from all over to reinforce their top scorers J.T. Miller, Brock Boeser, and Elias Pettersson. The sooner you jumped on the bandwagon, the more fun you had. Until top goaltender Thatcher Demko got hurt and missed all but one playoff start, this was the kind of year where it felt like the Canucks could do no wrong.
Something To Hate: A team like these Canucks makes preview writing easy, particularly because they had a mostly basic offseason and are already tied up by some health issues. This was a roster whose shooters overachieved, and whose goalie overachieved, and so the obvious choice to is to predict this team will take two steps back and look more like the aimless wanderers they were in the lost days of 2023.
Bold Prediction: Book ’em in the conference finals!
Florida Panthers (Champs)
Something To Like: Matthew Tkachuk has very pretty teeth, and despite his nasty reputation he got to smile a lot this summer. The Panthers almost blew it in humiliating fashion in the Final against the Oilers, but ultimately, they raised the Cup, and that’s what matters. Previously a bit of a loose-cannon squad that loved to get into shooting contests, Tkachuk’s leadership helped refine their style into a bruising beast that would fight you for every inch of ice until you fell over, exhausted. Additionally, Sam Reinhart somehow scored 57 goals, and both of their goalies enjoyed unexpectedly great years, so basically every aspect of this team was something to envy.
Something To Hate: Also Matthew Tkachuk? While his fellow pest Nick Cousins faded out in the playoffs, this duo helped make the Panthers the most unfriendly, unfun team to play against all season. They loved to bait teams into penalties and squeeze them on every pass, and watching your guys go up against them usually meant staring the deficiencies of your faves right in the eye. (Looking back on my post-Game 7 reflection, I was remarkably sour about them winning.) Panthers tickets are not the ones to buy if you want to see your team score goals.
Bold Prediction: Two straight years of making the Final while exhausting themselves with their sandpaper play, plus the usual champion’s attrition, means the fatigued Panthers start the season with a pretty rough hangover and just barely sneak back into the playoffs. That doesn’t mean they won’t be dangerous.
Winnipeg Jets (First Round)
Something To Like: I’m kind of stunned that the Jets are this far down here. I double-checked to make sure it wasn’t a mistake. But Winnipeg did in fact tie the mark for most regular-season wins in their history before disappearing like they usually do—five games into the first round. This 2024–25 team projects to be worse with the loss of several depth pieces and the fact that they led the league in save percentage last year. The thing to like, then, is the hockey quirk in which good regular seasons and playoff success don’t often correlate, and the second part is really all that counts if you can get there. As long as the Jets can keep pace ahead of the Blues, Wild, and Kraken to stay in the wild card scene, they’ll have a chance.
Something To Hate: The dreaded A-word: attendance. Winnipeg already lost its NHL team once in the ’90s, and nobody wants to think about these Mk. II Jets flirting with the same fate. But with Arizona no longer absorbing all the heat, this is the league’s smallest average crowd. The reasons behind this are a mix of understandable and noble: There’s the market size, lingering COVID ramifications, and the Jets’ unique reliance on actual normal people buying ticket packages instead of corporate accounts. But it means that there’s a special imperative on the Jets not to be underwhelming—to squeeze something new out of a generation that has to this point failed to produce a signature run. Unfortunately, that’s not something anyone can do in October.
Bold Prediction: Cole Perfetti, the 22-year-old forward with the vertical hair and the loose lips, becomes some sort of TikTok icon and guarantees the Jets’ solvency for years to come.
Carolina Hurricanes (Second Round)
Something To Like: The Canes put the “fun” in “fundamentals.” Once more, head coach Rod Brind’Amour’s strategy of maximizing shots-on-goal differentials paid dividends for Carolina, who finished third in the league in points and earned extra hockey for the sixth year in a row. Goalie was a bit of an inconsistent spot, but the skaters were solid up and down the lineup, and there may not be a more consistent centerpiece anywhere in sports than Sebastian Aho. Four out of the past five years, with the exception being the COVID-shortened 2021, Aho has scored between 36 and 38 goals. Much like the Canes as a whole, you know exactly what you’re going to get from him.
Something To Hate: That they were weenies in the playoffs yet again. What’s stifled Carolina from winning even a single conference final game over this run has been a lack of superstar go-getters who can take control of the ice in high-leverage moments and turn the shots-on-goal advantage into actual goals. They tried to mitigate that at the deadline last year by renting Jake Guentzel, but even so, the Rangers’ A-listers did just enough to edge them out. Being solid from top to bottom goes a long way toward taking care of business for most of the season. But when it gets late, your tops have to top their tops. For as many neat and cool players as they have, there’s still a top shortage in Carolina.
Bold Prediction: Even with some turnover on defense and the loss of Teuvo “Turbo” Teräväinen, everything goes exactly the same for them as it always does.
Dallas Stars (Conference Final)
Something To Like: The Stars are still chasing a second Cup to go with the one from ’99, but GM Jim Nill did a spectacular job with roster construction that paid off until Stuart Skinner hot-goalied the Oilers out of a 2-1 series hole. Last year’s Stars had a little of everything: a blue-chip defenseman in his prime, a cute homegrown points leader still stretching his wings, a microwavable winger from Finland, a 20-year-old who never slept, an ancient blue-liner still giving solid minutes, Matt Duchene, a resurgent captain, an old scorer looking for one last chance at a title, and an alien mascot named Victor E. Green.
Something To Hate: Joe Pavelski retired, which is a blow because even as he hit 40 it looked like he still had some gas in the tank, and that’ll require the kids to do even more growing. Nill also made what seems like a misstep in the signing of D-man Matt Dumba—who went from subpar to worryingly bad last year—on a two-year, $7.5 million deal.
But I get this feeling that there are more random internet Stars girlies in other parts of the world than there are actual Stars fans in Dallas, and at least one of them was crushed by the departure of Ty Dellandrea, a partially toothless fringe skater who was best friends with the starting goalie. So long, pardner.
Bold Prediction: It eventually clicks for me that Dallas and Houston aren’t that close to each other once the Space City expansion talks heat up.
New York Rangers (Conference Final)
Something To Like: It does not feel at all like the Rangers had the best regular season of anyone last year. But they did! Despite a Cup drought now at 29 seasons and counting, those who regularly took the Staten Island Ferry to the 1 train to see this team play at MSG were rewarded with a whole bunch of wins. As far as Presidents’ Trophy winners go, this was not an especially dominant squad, but they got to enjoy a staggeringly great year from Artemi Panarin as the playmaker learned how to be more selfish—plus a step forward for former No. 1 overall pick Alexis Lafrenière, a brighter spotlight on glue guy Vincent Trocheck, a cult favorite in the brutish youngster Matt Rempe, and seasons ranging from good to awesome from their most important pieces. The only thing particularly romantic about this Rangers franchise is the Chris Kreider/Mika Zibanejad friendship, but they play entertaining hockey.
Something To Hate: This guy Potvin, who I’m told “sucks.” Also, they weren’t able to get rid of Jacob Trouba’s contract, so they’ll still be paying him $8 million to line people up for checks and sometimes connect.
Bold Prediction: Everyone who quickly scrolled down to the end of this blog will go back up and read each word carefully and respectfully.
That’s all the teams! Tento blog je u konce!